A Time to Focus on Family

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“‘Go home to your family and tell them how much the Lord has done for you, and how he has had mercy on you.’” Mark 5:19

Remember the biblical account of Jesus healing a man who was possessed by a legion of demons? No one had been able to subdue this man, no one had been able to help him. Until Jesus. Jesus cast the demons out and restored this desperate man to his right mind.

How grateful he must have been. In fact as Jesus was leaving, this newly healed man begged Jesus to let him go with him . The man’s reason for wanting to accompany Jesus may have been an overflow of gratitude, a desire to be part of Jesus’s powerful life-changing ministry, fear that he had nowhere to go since he had destroyed all his relationships with his family and friends, or possibly a combination of these reasons. Whatever the reason, Jesus had another plan for him.

Instead of saying yes to the man’s request to go with him, Jesus told him to go home. He wanted him to tell his family how much he had done for him. To tell them about the mercy he had shown him.

We don’t know all of Jesus’s reasons for asking the man to go home. The Lord certainly wanted the man’s family to hear this amazing testimony of Jesus’s love and power. We know Jesus wanted more people to come to know him. But maybe he also knew the man’s family ached for news of him or that the man himself needed to be reassured of their love. Maybe he knew this family’s reunion was what was most important for that group of people at that moment in time.

Whatever his reasons, Jesus wanted this man to focus on his family. And there are times I’m sure that his plan and task for us is the same. We may have a desire to go somewhere or do something big for the Lord or we might just wish we had a more exciting role in life and in God’s kingdom, but sometimes in some seasons God shows us our main ministry is at home. Our main ministry is to be focused on our family.

The Lord has called me to such seasons at times. Whether staying home to raise our girls or serving in caregiving roles for loved ones with health problems or giving my time to help with our twin grandsons this past year, I’ve seen that at times serving my family is indeed a major part of my role in life and in ministry for the Lord. That doesn’t mean I couldn’t be involved in other activities, but I did have to say no to many things in order to fulfill the ministries to family that God placed before me.

I wonder if today the Lord is leading any of us to focus on our families? Is his plan for us to “go home” for now? If it is, let’s accept it as from him and go joyfully and in peace. Let’s shine for the Lord at home.

“But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God.” 1 Timothy 5:4

*When has God called you to a season at home?

*Don’t miss out on the One-More-Chance Starbucks Giveaway. Deadline to enter is Feb. 10th!

*The new issue of Life Notes, my quarterly inspirational newsletter, came out early last week. It’s not too late to receive it. Sign-up is free and to the right!

*Flickr photo by Ryan Smith Photography, Creative Commons License

The Mother of the Bride’s Right-Hand Woman

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Mother of the Bride, every MOB needs one—a right-hand woman. Someone you can call on at any time during your MOB journey. Someone who can offer advice as well as a listening ear. Someone who rides shotgun on your MOB shopping adventures and also helps with any task you may throw her way. Yes, MOB, you need a right-hand woman.

My right-hand woman for both of my daughters’ weddings was my dear friend Teri (pictured with me above as the reception wound down after Kelli’s wedding.) One of your BFFs, MOB, could serve as your right-hand woman, too, but many others could fill the role as well—a sister or sister-in-law, your mom or aunt, a cousin, or even one of your other daughters. As a matter of fact, my daughter Kristin ended up being another right-hand woman for me when Kelli got married.

And MOB, if you’re lucky like I was, your right-hand woman will offer all kinds of support. She’ll have skills in areas where you lack them. She’ll take joy in helping make your darling daughter’s day the best that it can be. She’ll give you honest but gentle feedback and laugh with you at just the right moments. When you’re overwhelmed, she’ll let you be a mess and love you anyway. She’ll be ever-ready to help and always keep you in her prayers. She’ll be your right-hand woman.

So MOB, look around and identify that helper of all helpers, that friend of all friends on your wedding-planning journey. Cherish her. Lean on her. And every now and then, thank her in a special way. If it involves chocolate for both of you, so much the better!

*Thanks, Teri, for being my right-hand woman when my girls got married!

*You might also like to read Make the Mother of the Groom Part of the Team and A Planning Journal for Your Mother of the Bride Notes.

*Photo by Will Flowers

Seating the Mothers and Grandparents on Wedding Day

-5264Mother of the Bride, as your bride and groom plan their ceremony, have they given any thought yet to who will seat their parents and grandparents? The Father of the Bride is an easy call—he walks the bride down the aisle and then seats himself. But who will seat the other guests of highest honor on Wedding Day?

It’s always more meaningful if other family members or special friends fill that role instead of just one of the ushers who may not have a close tie to the family. With so many details for the bride and groom to think through, MOB, don’t let this one get overlooked until the night of the rehearsal. Encourage them to plan for special memories by asking special people to seat the guests of honor.

Many times the Father of the Bride and the Father of the Groom are selected to usher in and seat their respective wives. My husband did just that (see photo above) during both our daughters’ weddings. He just had to hot-foot it back down the aisle so he’d be ready for his most important role—escorting his little-girls-turned-brides to their waiting grooms.

A variety of others can serve—an usher or groomsman who is a family member or family friend, the ring bearer if he’s old enough, or another close family member (a son, a grandson, a nephew, etc. of the particular guest of honor). Just think about who would be especially meaningful for each particular guest of honor and then ask him to serve.

So remind the bride and groom to plan ahead, MOB—and precious memories to you all!

*You might also like to read Wedding Photo Idea: Moms Light Unity Candle Together.

*Photo by Flowers Photography

Midweek Morsel: The Prayer of an Imperfect Vessel

6013255406_1b697baa36_z“But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.” 2 Corinthians 4:7

Do you ever feel unworthy to be used by God? I feel like this quite often—when I mess up and sin, when I see areas of my life that aren’t all God designed them to be, or when I struggle with my thoughts, attitudes, or emotions. At times like these I wonder how can God use me?

The good news is that God uses imperfect vessels. He created us. He knows we will sin and fall short of his very best desires for us (Romans 3:23). But he loves us, forgives us, cleanses us, and then uses us for his purposes and glory (John 3:16, 1 John 1:9, 2 Corinthians 4:7, and 1 Peter 4:10).

So for all of us imperfect vessels out there, here’s a simple prayer we can freely pray. Hope it helps express your heart, too!

Father, thank you for loving me. Thank you for using me even though I’m not perfect. Protect me from the evil one, the one who wants me to feel too unworthy to serve you. Help me be ever ready to do whatever you want me to do. Yes, Lord, use me in spite of my failures and sin. Shine through me in spite of me. I will indeed give you all the glory, and I will remember that I am loved!

“For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God planned in advance for us to do.” Ephesians 2:10

*What else can we do to battle feelings of unworthiness?

*The new issue of Life Notes, my quarterly inspirational newsletter, came out earlier this month. It’s not too late to receive it. Sign up is free and to the right!

*Flickr photo by avrenim_acceber, Creative Commons License

Cake-Cutting Wedding Day Tip

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Mother of the Bride, here’s an important cake-cutting tip for Wedding Day: After the bride and groom have cut the traditional first slice of cake, make sure that both the main cake and the groom’s cake are then cut and made available to the guests at the same time.

It’s a fact of wedding life that almost every wedding guest in the world looks forward to indulging in a piece of cake at the party. If someone wants a piece of the groom’s cake, don’t keep them waiting while the wedding cake is sliced for those who want a piece of the star-of-the-show cake. At most weddings, the guests have already been in waiting mode for the cake-cutting, so the last thing we want to do is keep them waiting longer than necessary.

Make arrangements ahead of time with your caterer for simultaneous cake-cutting. I didn’t realize I should have done this until we ran into a problem at one of our daughters’ weddings.

The on-site caterer for that wedding was busy cutting the main cake herself and had not assigned any of the servers to cut the groom’s cake. When I asked her to have someone start cutting the groom’s cake, she responded in a negative way. As a result, both cakes weren’t available to our guests until later. I’m sure some guests even had to leave before the groom’s cake was cut. On top of that, it was an unhappy Wedding Day experience for me as I was rebuffed by someone we were paying to serve us.

So learn from my bad experience, MOB, and arrange for simultaneous cake-cutting ahead of time. Your guests will be happy—and you will be happy as everyone joyfully savors the cake of their choice on your daughter’s big day. Now, “let them eat cake!”

*If you and your friends and family are taking care of the catering by yourselves, just be sure to assign helpers to cut both cakes at the same time.

*Flickr photo by Lars Plougmann, Creative Commons License

*You might also like to read Three Tips for Working with Your Wedding DJ, Wedding Day Tip: A List for the Photographer, and Day Before Wedding Tip: Preview Flowers.