Failing To Reach a Goal

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I failed to reach some of my goals last year—and a couple of them were high on my list. Anyone else have the same experience? No one likes to fall short of achieving her goals, but since my theme word for 2013 was finish, this particular falling short stings a little more than usual.

The biggest goal I failed to reach last year was finishing my book. I almost made it, but I didn’t quite complete the task. I finished writing it, revising it, and sending it through to my critique group, but I didn’t get the final edit and polish done by year’s end.

As mid-year arrived, I was on track and felt confident that I would finish the project so I put it on hold during the summer. I didn’t even want to attempt a final read-through while my husband was on his summer break and life was more hectic than usual. I would finish it in the fall when I could concentrate without so many distractions.

What I didn’t fully anticipate was the amount of time and work it took to be ready to attend a writers conference in late September. Nor did I realize that the writing advice I would get there would show me that my manuscript needed more work than what I had been planning on. The final read through I thought I’d do turned into another edit and polish.

And then life happened as well. Within days after submitting my book proposal and polished sample chapters in mid-October to agents and an editor who had expressed interest at the conference, my mom was in a car accident. Shocked and heartbroken, we watched her die a few days later.

In November, in the midst of grief, I got back to work on the manuscript, but I also had the good fortune of being offered representation by a literary agency while another agent also showed interest. I had to take time to communicate with the interested agents, pray, research, and contact other authors the agency represented to find out what their experiences thus far had been like.

All of this helped me achieve another goal of signing with an agent, but my work on the manuscript was interrupted again. And then of course, the last two weeks of December was devoted to family and Christmas break. Year’s end came, and alas, I had failed to achieve my goal of finishing my book.

I know I’m not alone in failing to reach a goal—so what do we do when it happens? If you’re like me, you’ll kick yourself for quite awhile. After all, it’s natural to feel aggravated at yourself and disappointed with missing your mark. But after we work through our initial discouragement, what do we do then?

The way I see it, we have three choices. 1) We can walk away in defeat and abandon the goal altogether  2) we can pick ourselves up and keep going for it or  3) we can reevaluate and see if we need to alter the goal in some way or perhaps break it up into more manageable pieces.

Which will you choose when you fail to reach a goal? I choose to press on. The goal is worth achieving, and I’m almost there. Distractions and roadblocks will most certainly keep occurring for all of us, but if we persevere and call on God for help or for guidance in reevaluating, success will surely come—even if it’s not what we first envisioned. Let’s not walk away in defeat. Let’s press on.

“But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded.” 2 Chronicles 15:7

*How do you stay determined to reach your goals?

*Flickr photo by Omer Unlu, Creative Commons License

*The next issue of Life Notes, my quarterly inspirational newsletter, will come out in early February. Sign-up is free and to the right!

Guard: Theme Word for 2014

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Like many of you, I’ve chosen theme words for the past couple of years to help guide me through the year. In 2012, my word was focus, and last year I chose finish. Keeping those words in mind helped me immensely, especially in my writing life.

My word this year is guard. When I began considering and praying about what word should be my guide-word this year, the word guard came to my attention time and again. Others did as well, but guard has resonated with me the most. Don’t you love how God guides us as we seek his wisdom?

I don’t know all the reasons I need to focus on guard this year, but I do know as my writing life moves forward, I need to guard my time and my heart carefully. I need to be on guard in making wise decisions and guard against feeling pressured into making decisions I’m not comfortable with.

Guard will be a good guide word in my personal and spiritual life as well. Among other things, I need to guard my health. I’ve learned from experience that when I push too hard and get too busy and stressed, my body lets me know it. Spiritually, I need to guard against Satan and the traps he tries to ensnare me in most often. I need to be alert to new ones, too. Our adversary will do anything he can to make us stumble and fall or strip us of our joy in the Lord. And of course, I always need to guard my tongue. I have a feeling that’s an area where I’m not alone.

As the year goes on, I’m sure I’ll see other areas where being on guard is needed. In fact, I probably won’t know the full impact of this particular theme word until the year is out. The Lord knows about it all right now, though, and I’m thankful he’s preparing me for whatever may come this year by guiding me to the word guard for 2014. I’m thankful to have a God who not only watches over me but equips me as well.

“. . . guard what has been entrusted to your care.” 1 Timothy 6:20

*What would be a good theme word for you this year?

*Flickr photo by Keoni Cabral

Table Décor Finishing Touch: Fresh Rose Petals

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Mother of the Bride, here’s a quick decorating tip for your daughter’s big day—ask your florist to sprinkle fresh rose petals on all the tables at the reception. Guest tables, cake tables, photo tables, buffet tables. They look beautiful everywhere. All it takes is a few scattered here and there.

Fresh rose petals add the perfect finishing touch—a splash of color and oh so delicate. They might even provide a whiff of fragrance. Plus the lush look of fresh rose petals just can’t be duplicated with the silk variety.

At our daughter Kristin’s wedding, it was actually our cake baker and not our florist who added the final cake decoration of fresh roses and then surprised us by scattering petals from some of the same roses on all the tables. Not only was it gorgeous, but it helped tie all the décor together by incorporating the flowers from the cake. Thanks so much to Emeline from Grandeur Affaires: Nibbles Café in Tulsa, OK, for adding so much to the overall beauty of the reception.

So check with your daughter, MOB, and see if she might want to add this delicate final touch to the tables at her wedding. Tell her I highly recommend it! :)

*What flowers—or colors—has your daughter chosen for her wedding? If roses aren’t available in that color, a coordinating color will work just as well.

*Photo by Chris Humphrey

*My annual Life Notes Subscriber Appreciation Giveaway is now underway. All current and new subscribers to Life Notes, my free quarterly inspirational newsletter will be included. Winner will receive a $25 gift card to Barnes and Noble. Sign-up is on the right sidebar. Read all the details here.

Despite Fears or Foes

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*Welcome to my new website! Huge thanks goes to my son-in-law Shawn for building my new website. I provided the content and the plan and he brought it to life. Many thanks also to my daughter Kristin for assisting Shawn—and me—in so many ways. I couldn’t have accomplished this without their technical expertise and support. Be sure to check out my new Mother of the Bride Blog and please tell all of your MOB friends about it. I’ll be posting to both blogs on Mondays and Thursdays. Thanks for your support!

“Despite their fear of the peoples around them, they built the altar . . .” Ezra 3:3

Facing fears and foes in order to achieve goals or to follow God’s leading goes way back. The Biblical account surrounding the scripture above is just one such example.

God had moved the heart of Cyrus king of Persia to issue a proclamation calling all of God’s people to go to Jerusalem and rebuild the temple. After they had “assembled as one man in Jerusalem” (Ezra 3:1), the priests and other leaders began building the altar so they could sacrifice the burnt offerings required by God. And they did this “despite their fear of the peoples around them” (v. 3).

History tells us their fears proved to be legitimate. Sure enough, their enemies heard that they were rebuilding the temple of God and immediately began making trouble for them. Scripture says the “peoples around them set out to discourage the people of Judah and make them afraid to go on building.” (4:4)

Sadly, work had to be suspended for a period of time when a new king came into power, but eventually—under another king’s rule and with his support—the people of God finished building the temple.

Today, we, too, will face fears and foes as we try to achieve our goals or follow God’s leading. The“peoples” around us will undoubtedly look different than they did in Ezra’s day, but they will always be there, lurking around, ready to frustrate our plans and discourage us—just like the enemies of God’s people did centuries ago.

The foes we fear may include people, but they might also pop up in the form of other obstacles like lack of ability or knowledge or funds or time. We might also be afraid of failure—or even the new demands that success might bring.

But whatever our enemies are, will history—or at least our own family lore—recount how we moved forward despite our fears of the “peoples” around us? Will we be as courageous and determined as God’s people who rebuilt the temple?

Let’s not let our enemies bully us into refusing the challenge or quitting before the victory comes. Let’s keep our eyes on the Lord and rely on his strength and resources and ability. Let’s not let our enemies win.

“Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.” Psalm 20:7

*What foes are you facing today?

*Flickr photo by Paxson Woelber

Midweek Morsel: A Prayer for Finishing Strong

Do you know someone trying to finish a project or reach a goal? Our son-in-law Jake will graduate from law school in May. As we said goodbye during our last visit, I encouraged him to finish strong, knowing how “senioritis” can affect any of us attempting to pound out the last stages of a project.

Maybe you’re in the trying-to-finish category yourself right now. I know I am. Remember, my theme word this year is finish. My goal is completion of my book and also pursuing publication. As I worked on writing the last chapter, senioritis set in—not for long, mind you, because so much remains to be done with editing, platform building, finding an agent, etc. But I had to battle the desire to let up nonetheless.

Join me, won’t you, in a prayer for all who are trying to finish strong:

Dear Lord, you are a finisher. You came to earth with a task to do, and you completed it. You are also busy completing the good works you began in each of us. Help us, Lord, as we push on to finish the tasks you’ve set before us.

Help us to not grow weary or distracted or discouraged. Please grant us the energy, the drive, and the skill needed to finish strong. And help us remember, Lord, to offer thanks and give you glory as we cross our finish lines. We need you, Lord, and can’t do it without you. Thank you for your help!

“As the time approached for him to be taken up to heaven, Jesus resolutely set out for Jerusalem.” Luke 9:51

*Are you trying to finish something right now?

*Flickr photo by familymwr

*Be sure to check out my Dad’s guest post if you missed it!