Savings Tip for Wedding Expenses: Borrow

All MOBs’ ears perk up when they catch wind of a way to save some money, and I’m sure you’re no exception, Mother of the Bride. Be sure not to overlook the value of today’s tip: Borrow when you can!

You’ll be amazed at how many dollars you can save by borrowing. And you’ll be equally amazed at how many items can fall into this category.

Some items you might try to borrow include cake knife and server sets, champagne buckets, white rose garland, hurricanes and other glassware for candles, a wedding arch, pew bows, extension cords, flower girl baskets and ring bearer pillows, and plant stands. If the bride doesn’t mind, you might even be able to borrow a veil, headpiece, or bridal slip. After all, she needs something borrowed for the big day! And you might even be able to borrow a small purse to match your ensemble, MOB.

So MOB, make a list of items and then check with friends and family. Someone might have just what you need. Be especially sure to check with friends who’ve hosted weddings themselves recently. One of the things I was happy to do during my post-MOB days was loan items to fellow MOBs eager to save dollars where they could.

Be bold, MOB. Ask to borrow when you can!

*You might also like to read Savings Tip for Bridal and Bridesmaids Bouquets,  Quick Tip: Getting the Most Bang for Your MOB Buck , and Making Her Beautiful—Bridal Primping on a Budget.

*I hope this slightly revised encore post from April 2014 is a help to you today, MOB!

*For info about my book Mother of the Bride and also my Wedding Inspiration cards, check out my Books/My Work page.

*The new issue of Life Notes, my quarterly inspirational newsletter with a giveaway in every regularly scheduled issue, will come out in early May. Sign-up is free and to the right! (If you’re on a mobile device, scroll to the bottom of the screen and click View Full Site to find it.)

*Photo by Flowers Photography

Anyone Snowed Under?

Any of you ever find yourselves snowed under? This was the sight that greeted me several years ago when I opened our door the day after a blizzard buried us in its immobilizing winter white. With temperatures below freezing and more snow on the way, our bushes and lawn didn’t fully see the light of day for quite a while.

I have a feeling that some of you might be snowed under. Snowed under by things other than winter’s icy calling card. Burdened by things longer-lasting or even more immobilizing than a foot or two of snow.

Some of you may feel weighed down by a burden of grief. I’ve certainly been there. Others may find yourselves buried under a pile of work or unpaid bills while some of you are bearing the weight of others as well as yourselves as you struggle to keep up with parenting or caregiving duties. And it might just be a combination of several things causing some of us to feel overwhelmed.

Are you feeling like you may never see the light of day? Be encouraged. Remember that we have One who wants to bear the weight of our burdens for us. We have One who says, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28 NIV)

So turn to him. Tell him you’re snowed under and ask for his help. Then relax in his arms and be at peace, my friend. Be at peace.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7 NIV

*What burdens you most in this season of your life?

*Hope this slightly revised post from February 2011 blesses you today!

*The new issue of Life Notes, my quarterly inspirational newsletter with a giveaway in every regularly scheduled issue, came out Feb. 1st. It’s not too late to receive it. Sign-up is free and to the right! (If you’re on a mobile device, scroll to the bottom of the screen and click View Full Site to find it.)

*For info about my book Mother of the Bride and also my Wedding Inspiration cards, check out my Books/My Work page.

*My photo

You Are Appreciated, Mother of the Bride!

Mother of the Bride, do you have moments when you feel unappreciated for all your wedding-planning efforts? Don’t worry. You’re not alone. Every mother of the bride feels that way at one time or another. After all, feeling unappreciated happens in most stages of mothering. Why should we expect anything different during the wedding-planning stage?

Take heart, though. The bride and groom will be forever thankful for everything you’re doing to give them a joyful wedding day. As their dream-come-true day unfolds—or at some point following the festivities when they have time to reflect back on their day—they’ll realize how much effort you expended on their behalf. And they’ll be truly grateful.

In addition, MOB, you yourself will feel such gratitude and personal satisfaction on the big day for the blessing of being able to give your daughter and new son-in-law a beautiful start to their lives together. Just being able to bless them in such an important way will be blessing enough for you for a very long time.

So take my word for it, MOB—you are appreciated. When the crazy days and pressures of wedding planning in the midst of the demands of regular life are behind you all, you’ll find the bride and groom looking at you through eyes of love and gratitude. And that will make it worth it all!

*You might also like to read “Mother of the Bride – Needed and Loved”, Spirit and Soul Refreshment for the Mother of the Bride, and Wisdom and Encouragement for the Mother of the Bride.

*Hope this slightly revised post from April 2014 blessed you today, MOB!

*For info about my book Mother of the Bride check out my Books/My Work page.

*The next issue of Life Notes, my quarterly inspirational newsletter, comes out in early February. One lucky subscriber (new or current) will receive a $15 gift card to Starbucks and a signed copy of my book to use personally, give as a gift, or donate to a library. Sign-up is free and to the right! (If you’re on a mobile device, scroll to the bottom of the screen and click View Full Site to find it.)

*Photo by Chris Humphrey

Guest List Help: Don’t Forget the Father of the Bride

Mother of the Bride, when you’re thinking of people to include on your portion of the guest list for your daughter’s upcoming wedding, don’t forget to ask for help—from the father of the bride. That’s right, here is one of the tasks where you need to get his input and find out his desires.

Don’t assume that you know who the FOB would like to invite to the wedding. You might be surprised by just exactly who he wants—or doesn’t want—to invite to join you for the festivities. He may want to invite his co-workers but not his boss, or he might like to include his golfing buddies but not the fellow members of the civic group committee he’s serving on.

Also be sure to get his input on the total number of guests to invite. Unless the bride and groom are paying for their own wedding, you need to be on the same page with the FOB on this important decision since it will impact the cost of the wedding. If you avoid hard feelings over unexpected financial stress, everyone will be happier when wedding day arrives.

MOB, maybe you could even make the guest list conversation fun and make a date out of it. Go for coffee or dessert and take your pad of paper along. Brainstorm names with the father of the bride and enjoy something yummy while you’re doing it. Another win-win on the wedding planning front!

*You might also like to read Budget Agreement with the Father of the BrideWedding Day Emotion: Father-Daughter Dance Songs, and Wedding Day: Grab FOB for Impromptu Portrait

*For info about my book Mother of the Bride and also my Wedding Inspiration cards, check out my Books/My Work page.

*The new issue of Life Notes, my quarterly inspirational newsletter with a giveaway in every regularly scheduled issue, came out early this month. It’s not too late to receive it. Sign-up is free and to the right! (If you’re on a mobile device, scroll to the bottom of the screen and click View Full Site to find it.)

*I hope this slightly revised encore post from Mar. 2014 blessed you today!

*Flickr photo by Corey Ann, Creative Commons License

5 Things Every Bride-To-Be Needs to Hear from Her Mother

*I won’t be posting next week during Thanksgiving but will be back on Nov. 27. Have a happy Thanksgiving!

Mother of the Bride, as your daughter prepares to marry, she’s navigating a season like no other—as are you.

Not only are you both planning the biggest events you’ve probably ever planned, but you are both experiencing the shifting sands of changing family dynamics. She is shifting her primary loyalty to her husband-to-be and also developing relationships with his family while you are preparing for the final letting go as well as welcoming another family member into your family’s fold.

Since like any good mother, you’ll want to make her wedding planning experience and her family transition as easy as possible, here are 5 things she needs to hear from you right now. I pray that they will help both of you navigate the emotional mother-daughter waters you find yourselves in. May your season of planning and change go as smoothly as possible—and even hold unexpected blessings.

5 Things Your Bride-to-Be Daughter Needs to Hear from You

  1. This is your wedding, not mine, and you and your groom’s desires are the ones that matter the most. It’s okay, MOB, to share some of your most deeply held desires concerning the wedding—after all, it will be a highlight of your life and her dad’s life as well—but when it comes down to final decisions, those should reflect the couple’s desires.
  2. We welcome the love of your life into our family with open arms and will love him like a son. This will be a process of course as you may need time, MOB, to get to know him better, but just hearing your assurances of your welcoming love for him will mean the world to her.
  3. Even though you’re starting a new family, you’ll always be my dearly loved daughter who can count on me in good times and bad. At this critical time of family transition, MOB, your sweet girl needs to know that you’ll always love her and you’ll always be there for her. And as you assure her of your unchanging love, this will give her an opportunity as well to reassure you of your place in her heart.
  4. I’m sorry—I didn’t handle that very well. There may be (will be!) times during the wedding planning process, MOB, that you will say or do something that you wish you hadn’t. Tensions can run high at times and in those moments it’s so easy to act or speak in haste. When you’ve done something that hurts feelings or offends, apologize as quickly as possible. Keeping loving and peaceful relationships is the way to go.
  5. How can I help you? Whether with wedding details, relationship issues with any of her friends and family, or other day-to-day life stresses that can be compounded by the pressures she’s feeling as wedding day approaches, your girl needs you, MOB. Find out how you can best help her with whatever she’s going through. She will be forever grateful.

Good luck, MOB, as you and your precious daughter navigate the days ahead. May these pointers help along the way!

*You might also like to read Mother of the Bride’s Wedding Day Advice for the BridePre-Ceremony Wedding Day Prayer Idea: The Mother of the Bride Prays for the BrideA Prayer for the Newlyweds, and A Message for the Newlyweds.

*For info about my book Mother of the Bride and also my Wedding Inspiration cards, check out my Books/My Work page.

*The new issue of Life Notes, my quarterly inspirational newsletter with a giveaway in every regularly scheduled issue, came out Nov. 1st. It’s not too late to receive it. Sign-up is free and to the right! (If you’re on a mobile device, scroll to the bottom of the screen and click View Full Site to find it.)

*Photo by rawpixel on Unsplash